Failing Jesus

Failing Jesus


Meanwhile, Simon Peter was back at the fire, still trying to get warm. The others there said to him, "Aren't you one of his disciples?" He denied it, "Not me.”
John 18:25 The Message


I was in a play where I had to portray Judas and the other person acted as Simon Peter. We both wore black on a dimly lit stage. Our conversation was about whether to continue a belief in Jesus right after his crucifixion. The tension in the play was due to our both having betrayed Jesus, but one of us lost all hope and the other had not. My character saw failure as separation. Do you feel the same way about God?

I once had a discussion about this very topic with a friend. I told her that God loved her. She replied that he didn’t. I asked her why she felt that way. She said, “I’ve done too many bad things to be forgiven or loved.”

But doesn’t grace cover that? I am not speaking of cheap grace that means you go out and do what you want without fear of reprisal. I mean real grace. The kind that says, “I know you messed up. I know that sometimes there are consequences for your behavior, but we can get through this together.” I think Peter understood Real Grace even if he did not know what it was called.

I would say that failing Jesus is a prerequisite for following him. If you have never failed him, then it wasn’t Jesus you were serving.

What I liked about our play was that Peter offered up an idea that may not have been so popular. Peter’s life suggested room for error and reconciliation. I think that failing Jesus is a place where no one wants to be, but while we are there, we can take in the lesson that Jesus still forgives, he still reconciles, and he still wants us. And maybe, that is what he expected in the first place.