Mutiny in me

Mutiny in me

I know that nothing good lives in me, this is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. Romans 7: 18 NIV

Some time ago I read Treasure Island from Robert Lewis Stevenson. It is an exciting book full of intrigue, superstitious swashbucklers and back stabbing scallywags. It's one of my favorite books! In the story, many of the crew pretended to be upright sailors. But in a brief time they turned into mutinous traitors. I once heard a poem where the writer equates sailing in a small boat to living with God. My favorite line is, "There is a mutiny at sea; is it me?"

As often as I desire and attempt to be my approximation of good, I often times catch myself being bad. I don't even measure up to my own idea of goodness! Just like Paul, I struggle to do good and sometimes (okay, most times) bad results. And doing bad seems to come naturally for me, no real effort is required. An honest self-assessment reveals that I am always capable of living against God even though I choose (and desire) to do good.

Though the internal struggle rages on, I know that my saving grace is uh... grace. Or, I should say that grace is the tool that God uses to give me salvation (Ephesians 2:5), justification (Titus 3:7), anointing (Psalms 45:2) and godly sufficiency (2 Corinthians 12:9). Even though there is a mutiny in me, I know that God has provided all that I need by the grace given to me in Christ. I know that Christ has covered everything that is wrong with me (Isaiah 53:5 The Message).